Heroin Part 1

One day at a time...
That's how it starts, and that's how you end up. My oldest daughter has an addiction to heroin. Its been at least 6 years...she will be 21 in September. It was the 4th of July, just before her 16th birthday when she told us she needed help. Up to that point, we knew something was wrong, but HOW wrong?! Something that was just a phase, experimental, rebellious, or an actual problem? At 16, it can be hard to tell. It all started when she got caught smoking (cigarettes) in the girls restroom when she was 14. On a gut feeling I went through her bedroom and found pills. We sat her down and found out the pills were ecstasy, she had been sneaking out a few nights a week going to raves. After that, the sneaking out got more frequent, and the smoking and ecstasy turned into pot and (meth which I had no idea about until later). Cops were bringing her home for being out after curfew, and she got picked up for petty theft a few times. I pulled her out of school and placed her on independent study. I also put her in counseling, this after countless attempts of discipline. Where's that "parenting manual" when you need it? Counseling was not helping, independent study just made my daughter push harder against us, things were not improving. Everyone had their opinion, and up until a very short time ago, everyone still did. Everyone and their mother or brother thinks they know best, or thinks they know exactly how to handle a situation until it is happening to them. Worst of all this wasn't just a case of bad behavior. This was the beginning of an addict.
Let me just put this little disclaimer out before I even continue: There's no parenting manual, and as parents we all make mistakes. As a parent you know what is best for your child, your love, your support, that's it. You take into consideration everything possible, but at the end of the day, you do what you feel is best for your children.
Going forward, everyone seemed to know better than me how to deal with my daughter. I listened to everyone and tried everything. When my younger daughter went to her pageant my oldest came with us. I had never seen a heroin addiction first hand and at that point hadn't been in close quarters with my oldest daughter in quite some time. (She'd been sneaking out, and withdrawn for months). Hindsight is 20/20. I knew during that pageant trip that something was very wrong. My oldest daughter did nothing but sleep, even during the pageant, and barely ate. About a month later, on the 4th of July, she told my husband and I that she had an addiction to heroin and needed real help. That's when the fight began.....the fight to get clean.

-G
Come back for part 2, there's a lot more to my story.

This has been 6 years of love and heartbreak and I'm finally ready to share my experience. I know there are so many out there going through the same thing. This is not advice, this is just my story. If it helps just 1 person, my work here is done! :)